What have I been doing all along? Giving people false love and acting like I care? when truly have feelings of a rock. I forgot the path I was on, forgot how determined I am supposed to be, and i strayed off, it brought me back to where i was, just the same but a lot more hurt. I am not the person I think I am, I have alot more inside of me, alot more hurt and feelings I have suppressed, how did I let this pass, How did i keep this detail in my life away, what was I thinking, How can I forget people so much, I am truly disappointed in myself. Grief works two ways mainly right, one is to accept and the other is to deny, i have been denying that this didn't hurt me when it actually did. oh god, oh god, if only i could have said a few more words, and if only we weren't damned humans hiding emotions.

I should have read my mails more often. i should have said more.

What have I been doing all along? Giving people false love and acting like I care? when truly have feelings of a rock. I forgot the path I was on, forgot how determined I am supposed to be, and i strayed off, it brought me back to where i was, just the same but a lot more hurt. I am not the person I think I am, I have alot more inside of me, alot more hurt and feelings I have suppressed, how did I let this pass, How did i keep this detail in my life away, what was I thinking, How can I forget people so much, I am truly disappointed in myself. Grief works two ways mainly right, one is to accept and the other is to deny, i have been denying that this didn't hurt me when it actually did. oh god, oh god, if only i could have said a few more words, and if only we weren't damned humans hiding emotions.

I should have read my mails more often. i should have said more.